dreams this morn

I usually keep my dreams to myself because they are largely personal, but I want to share these ones to have for my own records on this blog.

Last night I dreamed I was walking around Detroit (which I haven't walked around in in real life yet BTW), and I was FEELING that place in my dream - I was feeling threat every second, feeling unsafe, and I walked into a parking lot that was the back of a store. I attempted to go through that door and the girl who was going before me was taken by a man with a butcher knife and he put it on her neck. This dream was cool because I was paying attention to my emotions and thoughts, and even in my dreams, was criticizing myself. When that girl was taken, I felt relieved it wasn't me, but then I thought, "that's selfish of me!" I guess I realized there might have not been anything I could do. Anyway, when I woke up, I felt a little scared. The dream woke me up, I couldn't bear watching her throat get cut, but it really sensitized me to what a privilege it is to live in "sheltered" and "safe" areas. To not think of your walking existence with every step on the street that you take. To just feel "safe." What a true gift. And I think in places like the ghetto for an outsider, that will be one in a million to experience. The dream was cool because it showed me how much I am thinking about Detroit, and it prepares me more each time I have a dream like that. I had a dream before I was walking the streets of Detroit, my mind made up what it would look like. So I got really interested and pushed me to take some self defense classes, to take away some of the fear of being attacked. I don't like having fears, but I know I have them! And one of those is being shot. I am grateful for how my dreams PUSH me!

Thankful,
Jess